No End In Sight

We are officially at our 18 month mark of waiting and unfortunately it still feels like there is no end in sight.  I thought by this point we would be nearing the end of our journey, but it looks like we will still have quite a long wait ahead of us.  They originally told us that the average wait would be 18-24 months and that because of our religion and Jason’s depression issues the wait would be even longer for us.  Because there was such a large group of people that applied to the Philippine’s program at the same time as us, it is looking like the wait is going to be much longer.  All of the most recent referrals that have come in have been over 24 months and I know of quite a few that are at 25 and 26 months still waiting.  What this means for us is that the earliest we will be getting a referral looks to be the beginning of next year.  We knew when we started that this was going to be a long journey, but I guess we didn’t realize just how long it was going to be.  We still could get a referral any time now, but I am not holding my breath on it being any time soon.  Thankfully we are staying plenty busy to keep our minds off of it, but it does feel sometimes like it is never going to happen.  

It has also officially been a year since we asked to be matched with the little boy I wrote about 2 posts back.  It has been so hard to see him on the waiting list all this time knowing that he could have been with us had they accepted us.  In fact a couple weeks ago we decided to ask our agency if it would be possible to request the match again, hoping that since it had been so long and they still hadn’t found the perfect match, that they would accept us this time.  I had been praying about it for some time and felt that it was time to ask and see what happened since I hadn’t really gotten a clear answer.  It turned out that the week I decided to ask was the same week he had been matched already with another family.  Because I asked, our agency called their representative in the Philippines and found out that he had just been matched.  I guess the answer to my prayers couldn’t have been more clear than that.  It really was just not meant to be.  I am happy that he is finally going to be adopted, but I still wish it could have been to us.  I know the Lord has other plans and one day I will be very thankful that this match did not happen so we could end up with the child that is meant to be part of our forever family.