The Philippines

The Philippines is located in Southeast Asia, with Manila as its capital City.  The Philippine archipelago comprises 7,107 islands.  There are 80 languages spoken with Tagalog being the national language.  The Philippines has been governed both by Spain and by the United States.  You can see influence from both along with Malaysian influence in Filipino traditions, food, and language.  Religion is extremely important to Filipinos with Catholicism being the primary religion of the country. The people of the Philippines are known for their happy and friendly demeanor.  

The landscape in the Philippines is full of beautiful beaches, tropical forests, active volcanoes, coral waters, and green rolling hills.  

It’s hard to believe that in a country surrounded by such beauty there is so much poverty. Nearly one-third of Manila’s 10 million residents live in slums and squatter settlements.  It is no wonder that there are so many children given up for adoption in the Philippines.   

Adoption Requirements

Below is a list of all of our adoption requirements.

All God’s Children Home Study Required Documents:

AGCI Client Rights Statement

AGCI Grievance Policy

AGCI Fee Schedule

Post Placement Schedule

Home Study Agreement

Criminal Record Check for each applicant

Child Abuse Record Check for each applicant

6 Reference Letters (co-worker, neighbor, friend, spiritual leader, and two different family members)

Personal Profile for each applicant (included around 200 questions)

Financial Worksheet

Bank Letter Verifying Account Standings

Employment and Income Confirmation from Employer

Guardianship Statement

Medical (for each applicant and all children)

AGCI Client Information/Consent for Services

Copy of Birth Certificate for all family members

Copy of Marriage Certificate

Copy of most recent Form 1040 Federal Tax Return

Photo of Applicants and Children

Military Discharge Form

Proof of Life Insurance

Proof of Health Coverage

Verification of Residency for last 5 years

Wide Horizons For Children Documents:

Application

Release of Confidential Information

Policy Guidelines for Adoption

Adoption Services Agreement

WHFC & Prospective Adoptive Parents Mutual Responsibilities 

Fee Agreement

Problem Resolution Procedure

Documentation Update Agreement

Post Placement Agreement

Insurance Affidavit

Medical Statement for each family member

WHFC Pre-Adoption Education (12 hours)

Interagency Agreement on the Placement of Older Children

Service Providers Worksheet

Philippine Intercountry Adoption Board(ICAB) Dossier Requirements:

Bank or Certified Check for $2,700 

Photographs of Prospective Adoptive Parents, Extended Family and the Home

ICAB Application Form

Type of Child Acceptable to Family Form

Personal Letter of Commitment to Adopt a Child

One Original of Birth Certificate for Each Applicant

One Medical Statement for Each Person Living in the Home

One Physician Letter for Each Applicant

One Psychological Evaluation per Family

One Original of Marriage Certificate

One Police Letter per Family

One Priest, Minister, or Rabbi Recommendation Letter

One Employer Recommendation Letter

One Friend Letter Of Recommendation

Guardian Letter

One Copy of Pages 1-2 of Most Recent 1040 US Income Tax Returns

In addition to all of that we also have to file an I-600A Petition with the US CIS which we have to get fingerprinted for in Yakima.

We also have to get passports so we will be able to pick up our child when the time comes.  I just got mine in November 2007. Jason has his but will need to get it renewed since it expires in 2010.

As of April 1, 2008 because of the new Hague Convention policies we must now file an I-800a instead of the I-600a form.  With this new form also comes new home study requirements.  We now need child abuse clearances from every state or country we resided in since the age of 18.

Here is a list of what we have had to get done since April 1, 2008:

Child abuse clearances from Florida, Tennessee, Utah, Montana, New York, and the Philippines(NBI Clearance)

Since our home study has taken so long we have had to redo these things that expired:

FBI clearances

Washington State Criminal checks

Washington State Child Abuse registry checks

Medical Exams for all of us

Federal Tax Return Form

Letter from Jason’s counselor

Weathering the Storms

The first major trial in our adoption process was getting all of the financing that we would need for the entire adoption.  We had just recently purchased a truck and travel trailer and knew that those would have to go in order to have all the money we needed.  The problem was that it was winter and who wants to buy a travel trailer in the middle of the winter.  We gave up trying to sell our truck, for now at least.  We almost gave up on the trailer too but decided to give it one more try and ended up selling it in March after 5 months of trying.  Since we made the decision to wait for a younger child we ended up not needing as much money as we thought.  If we had adopted the waiting group of siblings we would have had to pay all the adoption fees all at once, but now we have 2 years to save the rest of the money that we will need.

    Another major trial for us has been things getting lost in the mail.  So far we have had 5 things from 3 different people get lost.  The first was our guardianship letter from my brother and his wife.  It was suppose to come to our house but never made it.  It did eventually make it back to them and they just had to resend it.  The next two were referral letters from 2 different people that were suppose to go to our social worker. Those never made it and never got returned.  We double and triple checked to make sure they were using the right address and sure enough they were.  One of them had made a copy so he has sent his 3 times now and it still has not made it.  The other one is still working on writing his again. This has been so frustrating for us because it is completely out of our hands.  I guess this is part of learning to trust in the Lord’s timing and not ours.  

    In the beginning we had some problems with people around us not being very supportive of our decision or just thinking we were crazy for wanting to adopt 3 older siblings.  Now that we are looking at adopting a younger child or two everyone is much more supportive and understanding about our decision.  The only question we ever really get from people about our decision to adopt is why we chose the Philippines.  One reason is because that is where Jason served his mission. He loves the Filipino people and knows the culture and speaks the language.  I look at that as more of a benefit and not really a reason though.  In reality though there is only one reason and it is simply because that is where our child is.  Who knows, maybe that is why the Lord sent Jason on his mission there.

    For part of our home study all 4 of us had to get physicals done.  On the way to the doctor we had to sit in traffic for over an hour and right before we got there Eva threw up all over herself.  We had no change of clothes for her either and this was in December so it was pretty cold out.  All we had was an extra jacket. I took her shirt off and just put that on and hoped their was a hot-air hand dryer in the bathroom so I could wash her clothes in the sink and get them somewhat dry.  No luck-just paper towels.  Jason was already in with Breanna getting their physicals done, so with no help from him I got Eva as clean as I could and stripped her down to just her socks, diaper, and jacket.  I’m sure everyone looked at me like I was crazy but no one, not even the doctor, asked why she was only wearing a diaper and jacket in the middle of December. After our 2 hour appointment and after all of us girls got our Hepatitis A shots we then had to carry Eva out to the freezing cold car and put her in her car seat that was still completely covered in puke because we had nothing to clean it up with.  That was a fun day, let me tell you.  It all turned out well in the end though.  Our doctor decided to approve us for adoption despite my hypothyroidism, Jason’s high cholesterol and our girls not being completely immunized.

    About a month after our physicals we found out that we would have to do it all again for our dossier paperwork (the papers that go to the Philippines).  Lucky for us though it had been recent enough that our doctor agreed to just write the letters for us without another physical.  We did have to meet with a Psychologist though, for part of our dossier, to get a psychological exam done for me and Jason to show that we are mentally stable enough to adopt.  I am pleased to say that we both passed.  It was pretty painless.  It was just an hour interview where we got to talk about ourselves, our life, and our achievements.

    Another trial has been finding out that the Philippines has the right to discriminate based on whatever they want when it comes to adoption.  We were told that because we are Mormon that it will very likely take much longer for us to receive a referral.  I guess they consider us to be more of a cult than a religion and that most orphanages will give their referral to those who are members of mainstream religions like Catholics and Protestants.  Even non-denominational christians have a better chance than we do at getting a referral.  What this means for us is that we will still get a referral eventually, it will just take longer than most.  Most likely it will take a minimum of 2 years.  This was pretty disappointing in the beginning for us. I am fine with it now, because I know that the Lord is in charge and that we are suppose to adopt from the Philippines.  Even if it does take that long I will be ok with that.  It will just give us longer to prepare.  

    We are currently waiting on our social worker to receive our last two referral letters and our home study will be complete.  We then need to complete our dossier which requires an additional 3 referral letters and a bunch of other stuff.  Hopefully we will not have as many problems getting those as we have with the home study ones.  I am not even going to say when I hope to have everything done and submitted, because it is obvious to me that my timing means nothing.  If I had it my way everything would have been completed by the end of January. 

Let the Paperwork Begin

Now that we had decided on an agency we needed to find another agency to do our home study because Wide Horizons For Children is located in another state.  We decided on All God’s Children which has an office in Bellingham and their social workers travel all over Washington.  I couldn’t believe all of the paperwork.  We were told in the beginning that the home study would take about 1-3 months to complete depending on how fast we got all of our paperwork done.  It was the middle of November that we started and I had planned on us being completely finished by the end of January.  It is now 5 months later and we are still not finished.  Needless to say that the Lord has other plans for us.  Things are always done in His time and not ours.  He is the great orchestrator in all of this and I know that everything has to happen just at the right time in order for us to receive the child that we are meant to have.  I have to keep telling myself to have faith and remember things are out of our hands and will happen when they are meant to happen.

    Since we began, it has felt that everything and everyone is working against us.  Almost everything that could go wrong has gone wrong, but we have also seen some miracles along the way to let us know that we are doing the right thing.  The first miracle was getting the money we needed to begin our home study.  We had $0 in our bank account and had to come up with $600.  Somehow we managed to do it. I’m still not quite sure how we managed it.  We sold some things on craigslist that we knew we could part with and we gathered all the change around the house that we had and all of the money from my giant piggy bank.  We ended up with just the amount we needed all within a week.  That’s when we knew that we were on the right track.

Another blessing we received was how the Lord let us know that the group of siblings was not for us.  We were pretty set on adopting them for quite some time.  We had prayed and fasted about them in particular, but had not received an answer.  Because they were older children it was going to be very hard for us to convince both agencies to let us adopt them, especially since we had younger children in our home.  I knew that if we were going to go this route that I would need a pretty sure answer that these were our children.  

    After meeting with our social worker and hearing her side of things on what problems these kids could have and what could potentially happen to our children, I went home and sent a message to the online Philippine adoption group I am part of to ask their advice.  All of the responses I got back were pretty much along the same lines as what our social worker told us.  I felt sick to my stomach about it for two days and continued to pray about it.  I then realized that I hadn’t received an answer that these were our children because I was waiting for the Lord to tell be that they were when all along He was trying to tell me that they were not meant for us.  I then felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I knew I had received my answer and felt peace again.  It was kind of heartbreaking because we had been so sure that these were our kids, but I was very thankful that the Lord was on our side making sure that we received the right answer even though it was not what we wanted at the time.  We are now requesting 1 or 2 children under the age of 3 and feel very good about that decision.  It will be a long wait and we have no idea what is in store for us, but we trust that the Lord does and will be with us every step of the way.

Where the Journey Began

Our journey to adoption actually started before we had any children, before we were even married. Ever since I was young enough to start thinking about my future children, I always felt that I would one day adopt.  I feel that the Lord started preparing my heart then for the idea of adoption.  I was actually surprised when I got pregnant so easily after I got married. I thought I wouldn’t be able to and that was why the Lord had been preparing my heart for adoption.  Even after getting pregnant with both children so easily I still felt that I would one day adopt.  

    In the beginning Jason was very closed to adoption.  After we got married I talked with him on several occasions about it, but it would always end up becoming a fight.  He felt that there was no need for it since we could have our own children so easily and the cost of adoption is so high in most cases.  I knew it was going to be a long road trying to convince him that we needed to adopt.  This is where the Lord stepped in to work on softening his heart.  It started with me having major complications during my pregnancy with Eva and almost losing my life after her delivery.  We knew that the risk for me ever being pregnant again was too high for us to take that chance.  After much thought and prayer we made the permanent decision not to have any more kids biologically.  I made Jason promise that if we made that decision that he would be open to discussing the option of adoption one day.  

    During the next two years after I had Eva I began doing some research on adoption and would share things with Jason every now and then to see how he reacted.  I could tell he still wasn’t ready yet so I tried not to push the issue too much.  I looked into international adoption thinking that maybe Jason would be interested if it was adopting from the Philippines since he had served his mission there, but I came to the realization that it was just too expensive for us to ever do.  I decided that the best route for us would be to adopt through the foster care system or maybe take our chances with LDS Social Services.  Since Jason was still pretty closed to it I put it aside for awhile knowing that when the time was right that I would know.  
    In October of 2007 I got a call from Jason one day saying that Comcast had just changed one of its policies.  They use to reimburse adoption costs up to $3,000 and were changing it to $10,000 per legal adoption.  After hearing this I got back on the internet and started researching international adoption again, because this meant that we would be able to afford adoption from the Philippines.  Jason said to go ahead and start looking into it, but I think he was still far from consenting to actually adopting.  After determining a few of the best agencies, we requested some information packets and right away I felt pretty strongly about one in particular-Wide Horizons For Children.  After registering on their waiting children site we started looking through photos and we were both very touched by one photo in particular of a group of 3 siblings-2 girls and a boy ages 6, 7, and 9.  Jason told me the next day that he couldn’t stop thinking about them and I had received a very strong answer to prayer about adopting from the Philippines.  I thought at the time that it was for those kids, but I realize now that it was for that agency and for the Philippines.  This was the first time though that Jason was excited about adoption and he was actually more into it than I was.  He seemed to become very anxious and excited about the prospect of adopting these kids from the Philippines. I think seeing their pictures and remembering the kids that he saw on his mission living in some pretty horrible situations really touched his heart.  We both knew that the Lord was telling us something and that the time was now right for our journey to begin.  I don’t think we had any clue then just how hard it was going to be and we still have a long ways to go.  The main reason I have for writing all of this is so that one day our child will understand how much the Lord loves them and all that He did to make sure that they ended up right where they were meant to be-in our family.